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Believe it or not, Hinge, which is another dating app, ran a survey, and they found that this line improves your response rate likelihood by over 31%. It’s just like a fun little game for you guys to get to know each other.
I’ve been doing the whole online dating thing on and off for years now and let me just say, I’ve had the entire range of good, bad and ugly messages arrive in my inbox.
If rejection happens it’s not as personal or awkward (usually).
Here’s the deal with the messaging thing, a lot of people have their own theories on how it works, what works best, etc. Others try pick-up-artist “negging.” Some send ridiculously long messages about their background and their overall philosophy and what they’re currently doing with their lives.
It says “Hey, I might be sort of interested in you, but I’m going to let you do all the legwork.” Don’t give her a nudge and expect her to then message you, because she probably won’t.
My perfect night in involves a bottle of wine and my Arrested Development DVDs. I’d love to go to Africa some day.” you), you’re already half-way there. Related: Online Dating 101: Sending a Second Message After you’ve composed your message, ask yourself what you would respond if you received this from someone.
I don’t smoke, but don’t mind if you do…Well, message me if you want to go out.” Messages like this are not only boring (if she wants to know about you she’ll either click on your profile or, even better, ask you), but they give no indication of why you want to go out with her. Try something like this instead: “Whoa, you studied abroad in Ghana? Once she laughs, she lets her guard-down a little, she thinks you’re funny, and probably smart. Did you ask her a question, did you set-up a joke she could build on?
Not that you have to turn into Seth Rogen all of the sudden, but in general, on the internet, humor is far less abrasive than, say, ardent fervor.
Of course, finding your own tone and voice will definitely help too.
Good luck out there, and may the words be with you!